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Posts Tagged ‘buddhism’

Timber Hawkeye’s blog for January 2026 is entitled Cling No More – what he says in it strikes me as such good advice that I have to share it. The big takeaway for me is: ‘acknowledge your missteps with compassion and understanding, grow with humility and gratitude, and move on with peacefulness and serenity. The Middle Path means we carry the lesson, but not the burden, because the weight of the past can slow you down, and its gravitational force can take you down. There is so much wisdom in the Zen saying: let go or be dragged.’

This is the blog entry in full (there is a link to it at the bottom):

‘If someone attempts to use my past against me, it’s like they are trying to rob my old house; I don’t live there any more.

When we move, we change our address, and when Buddhists take their vows, they often change their name to a Dharma Title assigned by their teacher. Personally, I chose not to adopt a new moniker in the monastery for a few reasons: 1) I had already changed my name once in the 90s when it became apparent that Americans can’t pronounce my birth name; 2) I have known people who adopted a Dharma Name to represent non-attachment to their old identity, only to get attached to their new identity; and 3) I don’t think it’s necessary to deny our past in order to live the present.

Buddhism teaches that our suffering comes from clinging, and boy, do we cling! Even though we dislike it when others try to use our past against us, we constantly do it to ourselves. We replay our own mistakes in our heads; we cringe at questionable life choices; and we still allow outdated beliefs about ourselves to undermine our current potential.

Too many of my one-on-one sessions last year were with people who feel unworthy of love in the present because of something they have done in the past. Clinging ignores the fact that life is in constant motion. Non-attachment is not about erasing who we were, it’s about not being confined by it.

So, acknowledge your missteps with compassion and understanding, grow with humility and gratitude, and move on with peacefulness and serenity. The Middle Path means we carry the lesson, but not the burden, because the weight of the past can slow you down, and its gravitational force can take you down. There is so much wisdom in the Zen saying: let go or be dragged.

Give yourself the gift of travelling lightly into the new year. Pack only the clarity without any of the shame, guilt, or regret; have a sense of a humour about the past, and appreciate how far you have come.

May you find relief, space, and energy, not to reconstruct your old house, but to acknowledge that you have been gradually building a new home for yourself, one virtuous act at a time.

This moment is new, and so are you!

With much love from your brother, Timber Hawkeye’

Source: Timber Hawkeye, Buddhist Boot Camp Monthly Blog:

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This is neither an original thought nor a magic spell – but I think it might be a good way to go to minimise the kind of suffering we are liable to inflict on ourselves, so I’m writing a reminder to myself.

My seven keys to happiness:

  • Accept others as they are.
  • Accept yourself as you are.
  • Accept what other people give you graciously and don’t require or expect them to give you more than they are able or willing to give.
  • Accept you’re unlikely to change any other person, their behaviour or their priorities.
  • Adjust your exposure to other people individually depending on how much of them and their behaviour you can deal with.
  • Don’t take things personally – you are not the centre of other people’s universes, and their behaviour may not have anything to do with you.
  • Don’t attach too much importance to anything – everything will pass.

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Buddhism is not a belief system. It’s not about accepting certain tenets or believing a set of claims or principles. … It’s about examining the world clearly and carefully, about testing everything and every idea. Buddhism is about seeing. It’s about knowing rather than believing or hoping or wishing. It’s also about not being afraid to examine anything and everything…

The Buddha himself invited people on all occasions to test him. “Don’t believe me because you see me as your teacher,” he said. “Don’t believe me because others do. And don’t believe anything because you’ve read it in a book, either. Don’t put your faith in reports, or tradition, or hearsay, or the authority of religious leaders or texts. Don’t rely on mere logic, or inference, or appearances, or speculation.”

The Buddha repeatedly emphasised the impossibility of ever arriving at Truth by giving up your own authority and following the lights of others. Such a path will lead only to an opinion, whether your own or someone else’s.

The Buddha encouraged people to “know for yourselves that certain things are unwholesome and wrong. And when you do, then given them up. And when you know for yourselves that certain things are wholesome and good, then accept them and follow them.”

The message is always to examine and see for yourself. When you see for yourself what is true – and that’s really the only way that you can genuinely know anything – then embrace it. Until then, just suspend judgement and criticism.

The point of Buddhism is to just see. That’s all.

(Extract from “Buddhism plain and simple” by Steve Hagen (Penguin 1997)

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